Nancy, you are absolutely correct, there are certainly far more important things to which you and the AS community can direct your time and energies. I did not and would not suggest that reconsidering the term “Aspie” should be a priority on anyone’s agenda. In regard to advocacy, as I wrote above, I simply believe it is most respectful – and educational to those unfamiliar with it – to refer to a condition by its proper medical name. Thanks for reading and offering much helpful information.

—Cat 01/27/2012

Thanks, PB. I don’t think anyone saw my reference to Lianne Willey and her site, aspie.com, either.

—Nancy in Pittsburgh 01/27/2012

Chance, the people with Asperger’s you suggest should “demand we speak of them in a respectful manner” are the people who came up with the term aspies!

Regarding the IQ comments, it is a known fact that statistically aspies have average to high IQ’s. Examples of well-known people in history who either had or are suspected to have had AS include Albert Einstein, Thomas Jefferson, Isaac Newton, Glenn Gould, Lewis Carroll and Bill Gates. Historians have written books on this topic.

Here is a link to a wikipedia listing for a group called “Aspies For Freedom” (AFF).
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Aspies_For_Freedom
Again, they are actual people with Asperger’s Syndrome who chose their own name. And, again, the more you look, the more you will find references to the name. Every blog and discussion group that I have seen, created by and for aspies, uses the term.

—Nancy in Pittsburgh 01/27/2012

I still can’t believe use of the term “aspie” is what people are deeming important enough to comment upon, given all the information I posted.

I am a regular reader, Cat, and I do know that you don’t comment often. I appreciate your focus on keeping everyone happy, but I think you are missing the bigger picture here.

Thanks to the two other posters who listed Lianne Willey’s website. Did anyone notice the other references I listed of actual people with Asperger’s? These were just a few examples; there are many others I didn’t take the time to list for you.

The term has been in common use within the community WORLDWIDE for at least 20 years. This is a VERY LARGE community of people made up of professionals, people with Asperger’s, family, etc. – a group that is growing by leaps and bounds. A word was certainly needed for less cumbersome communication, which is why the word caught on. The idea that I should try to get these tens of thousands of people all over the world to change the term is ludicrous. There are far more important things that those of us who try to advocate for understanding of Asperger’s Syndrome can direct our time and energy toward – more things than any of us can do, as it is. A typical AS parent juggles therapy management, school and related issues, medical issues, family challenges and the mountains of paperwork required with regular life and job. Most folks try to also do some sort of advocacy, be it political action to change health insurance regulations or school requirements, or participation in the AS community for mutual support and education. You would not believe how much time we put in, and too much of it is wasted in unnecessary battles with folks who don’t understand or don’t want to understand, from teachers and special ed administrators to people in grocery stores.

It is ironic that the core idea here was to create understanding and tolerance toward aspies and their struggles, and the biggest response has been to focus on the feelings of some posters toward a term SELF-CHOSEN BY AN ASPIE AND ADOPTED BY THE ASPERGER’S COMMUNITY a long time ago. I know several aspies who would point to such a response as supporting their case that neurotypicals and their emotions are illogical and impossible!

If you want to talk feelings, let me say that reading the original letter where adults made fun of this young man behind his back was painful and sickening. Knowing that other kids in school do and have done this to your son is painful enough, and one would think it wouldn’t happen in the adult world. If you can’t relate to this, and you are a parent, imagine that someone is abusing your child when you are not present, and you can’t do anything to stop or prevent it. Then you get to live with that. The good news in the letter is that somebody spoke up and the ladies changed their behavior with a little understanding. I hope they get to know the young man and appreciate him for who he is.

—Nancy in Pittsburgh 01/27/2012

I understand where you are coming from Cat. I took a course on intercultural communication in college and towards the end of the course my instructor summed it up by saying “usually the most important thing in any exchange is that the person on the other end understands that you are making an effort to make them feel comfortable.”

In conversation I would probably refer to the disorder in question by it’s full name…even if I get that name wrong so that the person on the other end at least understands that I am trying my best. On the other hand, however, I would not hold it against a doctor, giving a speech at a symposium for instance, shortening “people who suffer from xxx,” so that he doesn’t have to say it two dozen times.

That’s it for me. I am getting off my soapbox now. Thanks :-)

—Advocate 01/27/2012